Cloth Diapering Convert
My Fav Ladies
Love Me or Hate Me…
I am drawing my line in the sand and throwing some things out there… In the past weeks I have seen so much nasty hate on facebook, twitter, and in general about parenting choices, and what people choose for their children and how they live their lives.
I have seen women downright harassed over choices they have made, when I myself have made identical choices in parenting… When it comes to parenting, we all do what we think is best for our own children, and make choices which work best for our own families, where we live, and the society that we live in.
For anyone to put another person down, or downright harass someone or call them ignorant because they made different choices, is no better than internet bullying which has been making such a big splash recently, especially in the young gay community.
Without any further adieu, some facts on how I have parented… and how I still parent…
- I selectively vaccinate my children
- My oldest son was breastfed, until he was 10 months old, and went onto formula.
- My second son was breastfed till he was 5 weeks old and we realized he could not tolerate breastmilk, and he was put on formula.
- I am a breastfeeding advocate who has used, and would use formula again if I have to.
- I made some of my own baby food.
- I also bought baby food… yes, I have bought Gerber, Earths Best, Happy Baby, You get the picture…
- I buy some products in the Nestle family. We use Juicy Juice, Willy Wonka Candy (an obsession of mine) Stouffers frozen foods, etc. These are products my family enjoys, and have used since I was a child.
- Both of my boys were circumcised, it is a choice myself, and my husband made during private discussions, and do not choose to share with the universe. That’s all I will say about that.
- We are a co-sleeping, and crib using family. We do both, and we do what works best for each child differently. Our oldest loves to co-sleep and always has, our youngest never cared for it.
- We buy organic, but not all the time, it just isn’t in our budget, or taste-buds. I know it is better, which is why I include it into our diet.
- We eat out… a lot. We enjoy to go someplace where not only they make our meal, but we don’t have the dishes to do. With two kids, a work load on both of us, and the fact that I did not get my mothers cooking skills in my genetics has aided in that choice.
- My youngest son is in cloth diapers. We love our AppleCheeks, and will be using them for the new baby also. I wish I had learned about cloth diapering, and started sooner.
- Our oldest son still uses disposable diapers. I am potty training him and that is what works best for us, and that is his preference.
- My kids go to bed when they are tired. We do not have “schedules” and we feel that this has made them better adjusted.
- I am Pro Choice
- I am not religious
That is just how we roll. This is what works best for our family, and I do not expect our backasswards choices in parenting to work for everyone or even anyone else, but it works for our family and that is all that matters to me.
Just like everyone else should do for their own family.
Sure, I will lose some readers over this, sure there will be readers who do not agree with me, but will still read because they are adult enough to understand we are not all cookie cutter clones of each other. Maybe I will gain some new readers for being real with everyone? Either way, this is my website, my space, and I will be who I am in real life on it!
Click to add your comment
Kudos!
Tina´s last [type] ..Wordless Wednesday
I have many of the same values you have, and some that differ, and there’s nothing wrong with that! I also get so frustrated with parent’s judging each other! My “Babywise” friends judge me for not scheduling my child, and letting him nurse and sleep when he wants to…and I have a hard time not judging them when they let their children scream themselves to sleep. But I try really hard not to judge because I don’t know their kids the way they do, and I don’t know them the way they do. Every parent has to do what works for them and their kids! As long as kids know they are loved, they’ll turn out fine!
Theresa´s last [type] ..C-Section Depression
Kudos to you for saying it like it is! We don’t have to do everything the same, or adhere to only one approach, in order for it to be “right.” What’s important is that you make thoughtful choices based on what works for your family’s needs. People who feel the need to bully, harrass or attempt to guilt others into making certain choices feel as if they have something to prove and are not at peace with themselves or the world.
I did selective/delayed vaccination for my daughter. I breastfed her for 7 months (I think my stash of frozen breastmilk gave her until about 8 months) but it ended for several reasons and she received formula – both conventional and organic. I did make some of her baby food and also purchased store-bought, although made the decision in both cases was to do only organic. After she was able to eat a variety of true solid foods, I didn’t adhere so stringently to her eating only organic, because we don’t eat 100% organic. We do try to limit processed foods, although my stepson is very picky and was allowed to eat Kraft mac and cheese, Bagel Bites and the like, so I eventually gave in and allow him to have those foods occasionally. (Otherwise, the kid won’t eat AT ALL and gets migraines. You have to pick your battles.)
I did disposable diapers, but if I were able to do that again, I would choose some of the newer cloth options that are easier to manage with stuffing and washing (like AppleCheeks!) At the time I was working full-time and had someone else watching my child, so my options were a little limited.
We eat out too much as a family, but the truth is, I own a business (actually, two), there are numerous activities that are a major time-suck, and frankly, I hate cooking during the week. 
We did co-sleeping briefly when my daughter was a newborn and I was recovering from my c-section but she soon transitioned to a bassinet in our room and then to her crib at 6 months. If you can do co-sleeping, great, but I’m a terrible sleeper and having a third person in my bed means I’m not going to be sleeping at all. (Trust me, I know this because my stepson used to regularly crawl in our bed when he was younger.)
And I’m pro-choice, highly spiritual but not religious per se (although we do belong to a church and my daughter attends their preschool.) My kids both probably watch way too much TV, but my 12 year old stepson has turned into a voracious reader and my 3 year old daughter is dying to learn to read, so I’m really not too worried. (My husband and I are both writers with degrees in Creative Writing – it’s in the blood.)
See, there are other mothers/families out there like you!
Way to go! People should never be afraid to speak up about what they do and what works best for them. Your family is healthy, thriving, and happy due to the choices you made. What more could anyone ask for 
Heaven forbid we all not hold ourselves up to the ridiculous standards that “experts”, media, and corporations hold us to. We live by the ‘pick your battle’ mantra in our lives, especially with parenting our strong willed little girl You a lot to raise awareness to important issues, and work as an advocate, so give yourself a big hug! Non extremists unite! lol
Also, please excuse my excessive use of emoticons…its finals week so I am a bit loopy haha
I was thinking the same thing the other day, I was going to call the post the stepford mom. Heck I might still do it.
Bobbi Janay´s last [type] ..Whats in a name
Bravo. We have a lot in common!
I totally agree that this online bashing has gotten completely out of control. I would never bash any parent for their choices, although I do have little tolerance for those who make their choices without information. Make whatever choice you want, just do it for a REASON! But that’s just my take on it…
I guess which way the bashing goes depends on the what circles you run in. I actually feel animosity where I work for things like using cloth and breastfeeding. It’s crazy. People just really like to judge, I guess. It’s a shame.
wendy @ ABCs and Garden Peas´s last [type] ..Holiday Open House!
yay!! Love you!! This post is great, I hope all of the meanies read this! I’ve awlays LOVED how you say what you say and believe what you believe WITHOUT being rude to people who believe differently.
Isn’t it easier to attract bees with honey vs vinigar?
*sigh* some people will never learn, but those people won’t be getting people to want to believe like they do cause they’re MEAN!!!
Anyway, once again, well said mama!
Baby Making Mama´s last [type] ..Do These Pants Make My Butt Look Big- No- But Your Diaper Does- Cloth Diaper Experiment Week 2
Well you gained a new fan here! Thanks for the post. Glad I found you via Twitter. Well said.
Good for you Danielle. I hope that whenever I decide to become a mom I can have the same resolve to just tune out the haters.
Fantastic! It’s just like looking in a virtual internet mirror.
DeathMetalMommy´s last [type] ..When Do I Have to Grow Up By
HERE HERE! Good for you. I am so tired of sanctimonious assholes who preach their opinions and force their choices on others. I’m vegan but I don’t constantly blast people with photos of animal cruelty or make gagging noises when I see someone eating meat. We have a real problem of people being disrespectful around here (in society, not on your blog:-).
Glad to have found you- through Babble. I’m 33 weeks into my third preggo, we have four kids including my stepson and I’m always interested to read good first hand accounts of pregnant women with kids.
maggie may´s last [type] ..List of Entirely Too Much Information You Are Warned
THANK YOU!
I am so tired of seeing all the judgement that women are doing–to EACH OTHER. I don’t know about you, but I joined social networking and began blogging as both an outlet and a means for connecting with women with shared experiences. HOWEVER, it is ludicrus to think that ALL women will do the same things for their family/children. Is that okay? Heck yes. We need differences to learn from each other. If we all chose the same method of parenting, life would be pretty boring for everyone. The bottom line is: are you trying your best with your kids? are they healthy, happy, and secure? Then, I think you’re doing a good job. None of us are perfect and some of us need to realize that!!
I taught childbirth education for many years. I always told my couples that there are many ways to be good parents. Every family has to find what works for them. No one has the right to judge.
My children are grown now, but we were a co-sleeping, breastfeeding, home birth, cloth diaper, home made baby food, religious family. They grew up great. But so did the kids of my neighbor who bottle fed, adhered to rigid schedules and routinely ate heavily processed foods, among other philosophical differences. I mothered the way that felt right to me and so did she. Most importantly, like many other friends who had different ideas about parenting, she is smart, funny, a good person and a great friend.
Live and let live is the only way to go. Otherwise life is just too darn stressful.
Marie´s last [type] ..Updates and Lets Talk
I agree that families should do what works for them with regard to parenting choices. And, good for you for making the choices that work for you.
Where I digress is regarding circumcision. I don’t view it as a “parenting choice” but as a human rights issues. I don’t feel any parent has the right to choose non-therepeutic surgery that permanently removes or alters the genitals of a child, merely for cosmetic or “cultural” reasons.
I’m not calling you or anyone else a “bad” mother or “attacking” you. I’m stating this here because, let’s be honest, that’s the issue that has caused all this kerfuffle. I have used the word “ignorant” when people have expressed opinions about circumcision which showed that they were unaware or unwilling to acknowledge FACTS, and only after they threw their opinions and choices out into the public sphere. In my opinion they opened themselves up to commentary and debate, and I engaged. Isn’t that what Twitter is for, after all? I don’t think this is comparable to “bullying” and think calling it that just detracts from the REAL bullying that does happen.
You are certainly entitled to your opinion. Others are also entitled to hold a difference in opinion.
That is just how it works in the end.
You sound just like me! I think it’s funny that Moms can be snobbish toward “practical” parenting decisions, especially tiny ones about diaper types and jarred food. Let’s just worry about teaching our kids critical thinking skills.
i’m not even a mom and i love this – i just fell over your blog and i’m very happy i did.
a return to civility is a wonderful thing during these sadly polarized times.
To each their own. It probably would be a rather dull world if everybody agreed with one another. But bullying people online shouldn’t be tolerated.
Joseph Condron@Yellow Magpie´s last [type] ..Love-Hate TV Review- Cutting-Edge Irish Drama That Shows The True Side Of Crime
Comment Guidelines
We all come from different backgrounds, and hold different opinions and beliefs...
While I understand and respect that, I expect the same respect from my readers. This website is “mine” and like my home, I expect respect, and reserve the right to “kick out” anyone who doesn’t follow the rules, just like I would in my home!
1. Trolls will automatically be deleted and banned
2. If you feel the urge to be disrespectful, or start a fight... move along.
3. No name calling... PERIOD
Happy Commenting!
Momotics is Copyrighted
Stay up to Date
Momotics Flair
Causes Momotics Support’s
Networked Blogs
Most Popular
- Printalicious Reveal! 139 comment(s)
- Ergo Baby Carrier Giveaway! – CLOSED!! 110 comment(s)
- Hot Mama Gown Giveaway! 72 comment(s)
- Week 7 – Apple Cheeks Cloth Diapers 68 comment(s)
- Week 14 – Lansinoh Gift Package 65 comment(s)
- What No One Tells You About Parenting 64 comment(s)
- Week 3 – Go Mama Go Designs Wonder Bumpers 63 comment(s)
Ads
Advertise on Momotics!
1