“He’s not perfect. You aren’t either, and the two of you will never be perfect. But if he can make you laugh at least once, cause you think twice, and if he admits to being human and making mistakes, hold onto him and give him the most you can. He isn’t going to quote poetry, he’s not thinking about you every moment, but he will give you a part of him that he knows you could break. Don’t hurt him, don’t change him, and don’t expect more than he can give. Don’t analyze. Smile when he makes you happy, yell when he makes you mad, miss him when he’s not there. Love hard when there is love to be had. Because perfect don’t exist, there’s always one guy that is perfect for you.” – Bob Marley
This couldn’t be more true. The surprise, stress, and realization of a third child we never planned put a strain on my marriage. Not to mention the fact that I am a giant ball of miserable bitch when I am pregnant.
I feel gross, ugly, fat, and don’t want anyone within a 50 mile radius of me. Literally. And I will be the first person to admit is because I am secure enough to know what my faults are in life. Nope, I am not perfect, and neither are you!
Over the past two months since our daughter joined our family, we are more in love that we have been since first dating over 4 years ago. We have instituted an earlier bed time so we can make time together every night before it is too late… We have gone out without the children, and overall kept our lines of adult communication more open than most parents do.
For a while, parenting, for the both of us, made us completely lose each other. It became a routine daily… Work, meals, home, chores, laundry, dinner, fire department obligations, or whatever else had to be done for the day… and then bed. Little communication, except around the children. We had went from being husband and wife, to only being Mom and Dad, and we totally neglected each other while trying to be super mom and super dad. Do you realize how many parents do this daily?
Take time to be husband and wife… Don’t feel bad when you need time alone, whether it is an overnight trip, or just a 3 hour meal and movie minus the kids. Relationships are like plants, they need water, and TLC. Give it!
And to close this, I want to give a huge XOXO to my husband who is not only the most amazing husband, but an incredibly father to our flock of kids. Here is to another 46 years together like the couple at dinner last night.