Stay with me…
If you are a stay at home mother… You are a lazy freeloader who doesn’t do anything. Because we all know taking care of kids all day long, while keeping up with household chores, running errands, and whatever your day consists of really is nothing… right?
If you work out of the home… You are a bad mother who should have never had kids to begin with! Want to work? Skip kids and just have your career as a baby… right?
If you are a work at home mother… You can’t compare to the mothers who leave the house to work, you don’t make enough money, and you do nothing more than neglect your kids because you have an internet obsession… right?
And I am finally letting lose! I am sick of work stereotypes when it comes to moms. No matter what we do, and how we contribute to our household… it is just not good enough for the general public. It pisses me off! It is almost like as women, no matter what we do, there is always going to be someone out there hating and saying it isn’t good enough… Same goes back to online Mom wars, but that is a whole other post in itself.
Lets be real though. If a mother wants to stay at home with her children, and be a homemaker, or whatever you would like to consider it these days, good for her! Her children will benefit from that. While it may be more of a financial burden on some, that is their issue, not yours. Good for them for making the best choice for their own family.
Mom wants to go back to work after having her baby, or better yet… has to go back because financially losing that income is not something their family can deal with… that is something up to that family to figure out. Maybe they will have a Nanny, or a family member watch their child… maybe they will use a daycare facility. Maybe they will even get government assistance for childcare. Because again if we are being real, with the economy the way it is today many women can’t afford to take 6 weeks off from work… and are back to work a week later. This is a reality in 2011.
That doesn’t mean they shouldn’t have children, that means they are doing what is best for their specific family.
But what gets me most is the hypocritical double edged sword of being a work at home mother. Are you a full time mom, or do you work full time? Do you watch your children and interact with them like a normal stay at home mother would do, or do you stick them in front of the TV all day so you can rot in front of the internet because we all know when you work from home… you aren’t making a real income… you are just sitting in front of a computer doing nothing for a whole $1 a day. (Insert eye roll here)
As a work at home mom… let me give you a run down of my day…
Do diapers… and get the kids dressed for the day
Get breakfast ready
Check e-mail while kids eat
Published pre-written blog posts while eating breakfast myself. (A breakfast which typically consists of a coffee, donut, or whatever I can quickly shove into my mouth before my “time limit” is up)
Stumble, tweet, and facebook said posts.
Allow my kids their 1 hour of morning TV
During this time struggle to do whatever chores must get done… (Laundry, dishes, pull out dinner for the night, vacuum, feed the baby… whatever is piling up, or has most importance.)
Hour is up…
Cue a craft project or some kind of learning activity
Tweet here, tweet there…
Diapers, potty time, check on laundry.
Snack/Lunch or whatever the kids decide they want at that point in time.
NAPS! If I am lucky BOTH will actually nap.
If I am lucky enough for them to nap at the same time, I can surf the net and have some down time, while working..
Write a blog post, or three. (Since I am contracted to write 5 a week no matter what now, down from 10 a week previously.)
Laundry, dishes, whatever…
Kids get up, lather rinse repeat… potty, diapers, snacks
Go outside to play, play on the deck, go for a walk…
Come in, 1 hour of afternoon/evening TV
During this time I prepare dinner, or whatever needs to be done at that time.
This is all from about 8am till 4pm….
From 5 till bedtime would probably send you over the edge.
So not only am I doing the normal job of a stay at home mom, but I am also working on top of it… Making exactly half of what my husband does in a calendar month. Give or take $100 or $200 on any given month. I have been doing it for 10 months now, and I love what I do.
I feel like I get the adult interaction that I need on a daily basis, as well as continuing to work, make money that at some times we truly need, what family doesn’t? but best of all, it keeps my mind functioning in a way I don’t feel like I was before.
Long story short… work at home moms work just as much as moms who work outside of the home… so lay off them… and mind your own career choices!
I want to thank everyone who chimed in on my Journey to Becoming a Certified Childbirth Educator post. Your comments and suggestions were very helpful, and helped me to make my choice.
In the end I made the decision to opt to bring a Passion for Birth Training Workshop to Connecticut in hopes of filling the class and being able to have the $395 fee for myself waived. And the best part of it all is I am going to have Robin Elise Weiss coming all the way to Connecticut to teach the workshop, so it is an even bigger score on top of it!
While I wish I could start the process much sooner, we have set the date for the workshop for late July. July 30th through August 1st to be exact.
It gives people a fair amount of time to sign up, and it gives me the hope of getting my 8 participants for the course in order to have my own fee waived!
If you live in Connecticut, or even in the tri-state area, and are interested in the course, you can e-mail me and I will be sure to pass along the full details of the class itself.
I am anxious for the summer now, as if all the snow we have been getting isn’t enough already.
I am looking forward to the new path this will take my life on, to become a Childbirth Educator, especially through Lamaze is something I have wanted to do, I just didn’t know if it would ever be something within reach.
On a side note, my first article was published in a major Connecticut new’s source yesterday, and on top of it, they asked me to continue writing for the same publication, as well as other offers from local media outlets for freelance work. I am officially going from a SAHM to a WAHM. I am not sure how I feel about it yet, but I certainly know this will help to ease the money burden around our house, and take a good amount of stress off of my husband.
We are still playing catch up from when he was laid off, although right now we are “caught up” thanks to our tax return.
You can check out my article here : The Born Ultimatum